Doing Exactly What It Says On The Tin

Wise words from Steve Jobs

2011-08-31T11:20:00.003+08:00

Thanks to the Copy Writer's Roundtable for this
Wall Street Journal interview with Steve Jobs:

"I was lucky — I found what I loved to do early in life. Woz and I started Apple in my parents garage when I was 20. We worked hard, and in 10 years Apple had grown from just the two of us in a garage into a $2 billion company with over 4,000 employees. We had just released our finest creation — the Macintosh — a year earlier, and I had just turned 30. And then I got fired.

"How can you get fired from a company you started? Well, as Apple grew we hired someone who I thought was very talented to run the company with me, and for the first year or so things went well. But then our visions of the future began to diverge and eventually we had a falling out. When we did, our Board of Directors sided with him.

"So at 30 I was out. And very publicly out. What had been the focus of my entire adult life was gone, and it was devastating.

"I really didn't know what to do for a few months. I felt that I had let the previous generation of entrepreneurs down - that I had dropped the baton as it was being passed to me. I met with David Packard and Bob Noyce and tried to apologize for screwing up so badly. I was a very public failure, and I even thought about running away from the valley.

"But something slowly began to dawn on me — I still loved what I did. The turn of events at Apple had not changed that one bit. I had been rejected, but I was still in love. And so I decided to start over.

"I didn't see it then, but it turned out that getting fired from Apple was the best thing that could have ever happened to me. The heaviness of being successful was replaced by the lightness of being a beginner again, less sure about everything. It freed me to enter one of the most creative periods of my life.

"During the next five years, I started a company named NeXT, another company named Pixar, and fell in love with an amazing woman who would become my wife. Pixar went on to create the worlds first computer animated feature film, Toy Story, and is now the most successful animation studio in the world.

"In a remarkable turn of events, Apple bought NeXT, I returned to Apple, and the technology we developed at NeXT is at the heart of Apple's current renaissance. And Laurene and I have a wonderful family together.

"I'm pretty sure none of this would have happened if I hadn't been fired from Apple. It was awful tasting medicine, but I guess the patient needed it.

"Sometimes life hits you in the head with a brick. Don't lose faith. I'm convinced that the only thing that kept me going was that I loved what I did. You've got to find what you love. And that is as true for your work as it is for your lovers.

"Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven't found it yet, keep looking."

Doing the right/write/white stuff

2009-10-15T09:59:00.002+08:00

By Christian Lander, Author of 'Stuff White People Like' - from Stuff White People

We all have a fantasy of something incredible happening to us by accident. It's impossible not to be captivated by the story of Lana Turner, sitting on a stool at a drugstore one moment, acting in Hollywood movies the next.

Well, you could say that I am Lana Turner . . . of the internet (the latter tag is important for clarifying any misconceptions about my physical attractiveness). I am the author of the accidental New York Times bestseller and popular blog Stuff White People Like, and this is my story.

On 18 January 2008, my friend Myles and I were having an instant messenger conversation about The Wire. Myles, who is Filipino, said he didn't trust any white person who didn't watch the show. I agreed with him, so we started talking about what white people might be doing instead of watching The Wire. Going to therapy, watching plays, doing yoga and getting divorced were the first things that popped into our heads. For some reason, the idea that a white person was too busy getting divorced to watch television was particularly hilarious to me, so I started a blog about it.

Originally, my plan was to take this instant messenger conversation and turn it into something that would make Myles and two other friends laugh. There was no expectation that it was going to be anything bigger – I wasn't even sure it would make them laugh. I just went to Wordpress.com, gave it the title "Stuff White People Like", and started writing.

The first few entries were short and almost completely directed at people Myles and I knew from our high school. The first entry, on coffee, was about the male students who would proudly attach a refillable mug to their backpacks as a gesture of their maturity. Man, we hated those guys.

But the more I started writing, the more I realised that I wasn't writing about other people, I was writing about myself. And I was full of far more self-loathing than I had expected. Within a week the site was up to 25 entries.

I thought it was entertaining enough to send to my (20) friends as a mass email, asking them to read it. But then an amazing thing happened. The readership started growing.

It's not hard to get your friends to forward on your web project, largely out of guilt or obligation. But when their friends, the ones who don't know you, start forwarding it to their friends, you have something special. I watched as the site traffic grew from a few hundred hits a day (mostly misguided searches for organic fair trade coffee) to more than a thousand. Then, somehow, it wound up on the blog for Good Magazine (published by Al Gore's son) and Comedy Central's Insider (the official blog for the US cable channel). Traffic jumped to 30,000 hits a day. From there it spread exponentially; soon it was crossing a 100,000, then 300,000 and 400,000. Every day I would just stare at my computer and say, "It can't get any bigger than this."

I began receiving emails from literary agents in New York City and Los Angeles. They wanted to turn the site into a book. I was floored. I knew that people spent their entire lives trying to get the attention of a literary agent, yet they were coming to me to turn my silly little blog into a book. By early March – less than two months after the blog started – I had chosen an agent. By the end of the month, I had a book deal in place. On 31 March, I quit my job.

Over the next year, the book would go on to be a New York Times bestseller, while I appeared on Conan O'Brien's talkshow and gave lectures at Google, Harvard, Brown – and now the London School of Economics. So in case it's something you'd like to happen to you too, here are a few thoughts on the matter:

• Be lucky I can't stress this enough. I would say it is responsible for approximately 41% of my success.

• Be true to yourself When you try to create something that you think will please everyone, it ends up pleasing no one. People can see through attempts to do something with the sole intention of getting famous. When you start your blog, do something that entertains you – and live with the expectation that your only reward will be writing the blog.

• Be Canadian People seem to like us.

• Be perceived as racist by idiots This will lead to more traffic than you could ever imagine. I would, however, strongly recommend not being perceived as racist by smart people. That will end poorly.

• Have an email address on your site This is how every agent and media outlet reached me. It is also how every piece of hate mail reached me. For the majority of blogs, the ratio will likely be one agent email for every 200 pieces of hate mail. Successful blogs can expect that ratio to be 1:400. Super successful blogs can expect some of the hate mail to come from agents.

• Be nice to everyone It may surprise you that being famous on the internet does not last for ever. Apparently, people have short attention spans nowadays. However, one thing that people will remember is if someone marginally famous was a jerk to them. I still remember and hate the baseball player who refused to sign an autograph for me when I was 15. Also, it will be less humiliating to ask them for help in finding a job once your internet fame is over.

Link: http://www.guardian.co.uk/technology/2009/oct/15/christian-lander-stuff-white-people-like

The best footy ad ever?

2009-08-17T10:22:00.002+08:00

Some stories just break your heart

2009-06-05T11:47:00.006+08:00

Like this one from the Guardian about a grieving couple that 'jumped off Beachy Head—with their dead son.

The bodies of Neil Puttick, 34, and his wife, Kazumi, 44, from Wiltshire, were spotted at the foot of the cliffs on Sunday evening. The body of their child, Samuel, was found in a rucksack nearby.

Samuel had been discharged from hospital on Friday after it became clear he was not going to survive. He was allowed to leave so he could die peacefully at home. The boy, who neighbours said had suffered serious spinal injuries in an accident about three years ago, was confirmed dead later that evening.

A spokesman for the Bath and north-east Somerset NHS said: "Samuel Puttick had been receiving treatment for pneumococcal meningitis at the paediatric intensive children's unit at Bristol Royal hospital for children.

"When it became clear that Sam had no hope of recovery from his severe infection, he was discharged to his family home on Friday 29 May at his parents' request. He was certified dead at his home by a doctor at approximately 8pm that evening.

"We offer our sincere condolences to the relatives and friends of this family. It would be inappropriate to comment further at this stage as the matter will be the subject of an extensive investigation and coroner's inquest."

Detective Inspector Ian Williams, from Sussex police, said: "As a result of our investigation, I am satisfied that Samuel's grieving parents, Neil and Kazumi, appear to have taken their own lives.

"This is a tragic incident and we extend our sympathies to their family and to the large number of friends and carers affected."
Flowers were left at the couple's farmhouse in the village of Brokerswood, Wiltshire. One neighbour said: "They were a lovely couple and they did 150% for that boy. It is all such a shock."

Sue Capon, who runs Brokerswood country park, said everyone was still coming to terms with the tragedy. "All of them were very good friends. It's such a shame," she said. "I only saw them three days ago."

On Monday, the bodies were winched to the top of the 550ft (168 metre) cliffs, as detectives broke into a silver Volkswagen people carrier found in a nearby car park that was believed to have belonged to the group. A half-eaten banana and family-sized bag of peanuts were left on the front seat, and there was a wheelchair lift in the back. The vehicle was towed away to be examined.

An Eastbourne coastguard station officer, Stuart McNab, said coastguards on a routine clifftop patrol had seen what they believed to be two bodies about 400ft down the cliff just before 8pm on Sunday and alerted police, but it was decided it would be safer to wait and carry out the recovery the next day.

McNab, who was one of the first people to be taken to the scene by helicopter, said he had found the child's body in a rucksack along with a second rucksack filled with soft toys and a toy tractor.

Sussex police said no one else was believed to have been involved in the tragedy, which was not being treated as suspicious.
A spokesman for Dover coastguard said: "It is really horrific and incredibly sad. In my four years with the coastguard I have never known anything like this."

Boone Oakley

2009-06-02T09:44:00.003+08:00

Nice company website and good use of youtube:

This is what the Olympics is all about

2008-08-20T18:00:00.001+08:00

In what other sport, would a competitor do this?

Note to Self

2008-08-05T10:12:00.002+08:00

In the next couple of weeks, I must update my CV / Portfolio - and ensure that a version is available online. And when I get to do the online version, I don't think i can go far wrong than mimicking this site by Jamie Gregory.

Enjoy the Silence?

2008-08-05T10:07:00.003+08:00

Does anyone recall the video for Depeche Mode's Enjoy The Silence? If not watch Coldplay's latest video - which was shot by the same director, Anton Corbjin

Sir Ken Robinson

2008-08-01T17:26:00.003+08:00

Sarah saw this Sir Ken Robinson talk a while ago here in Singapore - actually, it was a while ago everywhere else too - and said how awesome he was. After watching this video, I tend to agree with the missus. And the video has also prompted me to finish reading his book, Out Our Minds: Learning to be Creative. Anyway, the guy is quality. And the vid is a must for any parent or teacher.

Ogilvy on Advertising

2008-08-01T12:42:00.000+08:00

“The headline is the ‘ticket on the meat.’ Use it to flag down readers who are prospects for the kind of product you are advertising.”
“On average, five times as many people read the headline as read the body copy. When you have written your headline, you have spent eighty cents out of your dollar.”
“I don’t know the rules of grammar… If you’re trying to persuade people to do something, or buy something, it seems to me you should use their language, the language they use every day, the language in which they think. We try to write in the vernacular.”
“I have a theory that the best ads come from personal experience. Some of the good ones I have done have really come out of the real experience of my life, and somehow this has come over as true and valid and persuasive.”
“Good copy can’t be written with tongue in cheek, written just for a living. You’ve got to believe in the product.”
“The more informative your advertising, the more persuasive it will be.”
“What really decides consumers to buy or not to buy is the content of your advertising, not its form.”
“A good advertisement is one which sells the product without drawing attention to itself.”
“Nobody has ever built a brand by imitating somebody else’s advertising.”
“I do not regard advertising as entertainment or art form, but as a medium of information. When I write an advertisement, I don’t want you to tell me that you find it ‘creative.’ I want you to find it so interesting that you buy the product. When Aeschines spoke, they said, ‘How well he speaks.’ But when Demosthenes spoke, they said, ‘Let us march against Philip.’”

Pretty Girl in Crimson Rose (8)

2008-06-22T13:59:00.003+08:00

While doing some research for cryptic crossword clues, I came across this article. So will have to get a copy of this book. Btw, my favourite cryptic crossword clue is 'gegs (9,4)'. And if you need a clue to solve it, think of something that you may have on toast!

If you do one thing today, read this ...

2008-06-13T12:41:00.003+08:00

Quality copy. And stirring stuff. From the actor, Lennie James.

Barely a week goes by without another young Briton being brutally killed in a knife attack. Acclaimed actor and writer Lennie James, who will star in Fallout, the TV version of Roy Williams's play about teenage violence, has watched in horror as the death toll mounts. Here, in an open letter to the knife carriers, he draws on his own difficult upbringing to make an impassioned plea to the lost generation of young boys who visit random savagery on their victims
Lennie James
Sunday June 8 2008
The Observer
Next month Channel 4 will show Fallout by Roy Williams, the screen version of his critically acclaimed stage play. Beautifully directed by Ian Rickson, Fallout is the enthralling story of the murder of a 16-year-old boy, Kwame, and the consequences that befall the four boys involved in the killing, the two girls connected to it and the police officers investigating the case.

I play one of the police officers, DS Joe Stephens, who is returning for the first time to the estate where he grew up to help in the investigation. He identifies greatly with the victim. Like Joe, Kwame had ambitions outside the confines and dictates of his estate and his background. Joe takes Kwame's death very personally, as if the killers had murdered Joe's younger self. This leads him to pursue the suspects with a zeal that alarms his colleagues, and to bend the rules to breaking point.

First and foremost, as it was on stage, Fallout is a wonderfully written, engrossing and entertaining story about belonging, escape, revenge and love. It is also a story that attempts to make sense of the seemingly senseless killing of a 16-year-old boy, stabbed to death for his trainers.

The issue of knife and gun crime among the young is firmly on the agenda at the moment, and rightly so. Since we premiered Roy's play at the Royal Court Theatre in London in 2003 some 350 teenagers have been shot or stabbed to death by other teenagers or young adults, and that may be a conservative estimate. Twenty-six teenagers were shot or stabbed in London alone in 2007. So far this year more than 100 have been attacked using knives. The number of dead is already at 13 and likely to rise.

Much has been written on the subject of this seeming spike in teen-on-teen violence over the past year or so. Columnists, commentators, politicians, child psychologists, law-makers, police officers, religious and community leaders, bereaved parents, gang members and ex-teenage killers have all expressed their opinions, apportioned blame and offered solutions. I myself was intent on writing a comparison between the war in Iraq and Afghanistan with the so-called 'war on street crime' announced by Boris Johnson, and others before him, and the relative collateral damage and loss of young lives. It was to be an investigation into whether the best response to our young people killing our young people is to declare war on them.

But as I sat down to complete the article, to add some statistics to bolster my argument and to clarify my misgivings as to whether Boris had an exit strategy for his war, I read of the death of Robert Knox. Robert, 18, was allegedly stabbed to death by a 21-year-old who was carrying two knives. So I scrolled up my article to change '13 [dead] and likely to rise' to 14 and likely to... As I did so I wondered how many more times I would have to scroll up and change that number before the article was printed. Would I have to change 16 to 17 and 18 and 19 and so on, and would it still be 'likely to rise'?

Suddenly the article I'd thought would be an interesting and insightful take on the subject became little more than another voice added to the collective hand-wringing and navel-gazing that seems to have characterised the response to this issue. It is all well intentioned and absolutely necessary if we are to find solutions. The problem is that we are so very adept at exploring our own deficiencies but so very slow to improve on them or to learn from them.

Like a huge tanker turning 180 degrees, it takes for ever for our sentiment to be made into decisive action. In the meantime, should the current trend continue, a teenager or two will be stabbed, possibly killed, every week for the rest of this year, like last, by someone no older than themselves.

So instead I have written an open letter to the knife-carriers, to the murderers-in-waiting and their potential victims. I don't know how many of them might be Observer readers, but in this www. world, where this is written may not be where it is read.

Since this article was written, two more teenagers have been killed in London, bringing the total to 16.

· Fallout, part of Disarming Britain, Channel 4's season on gun and knife crime, is to be screened at 10pm on Thursday 3 JulyTo whom it may concern,

My name is Lennie James. I am a 42-year-old father of three. I grew up in south-west London. I was brought up by a single mother. I was orphaned at 10, lived in a kids' home until I was 15 and was then fostered. I tell you this not to claim any special knowledge of how you've grown, but to explain how I have, and from where I draw my understanding.

I want to talk to you about the knife you're carrying in your belt or pocket or shoe. The one you got from your mum's kitchen or ordered online or robbed out of the camping shop. The knife you tell yourself you carry for protection, because you never know who else has got one.

I want to talk to you about what that knife will do for you. If you carry it, the chances are you will be called on to use it. It is a deadly weapon, so if you use it the chances are you will kill with it. So after you've killed with it, after you've seen how little force it takes for sharpened steel to puncture flesh. After your mates have run away from the boy you've left bleeding. When you're looking for somewhere to dash the blade, and lighter fluid to burn your clothes. When your blood is burning in your veins and your heart is beating out of your chest to where you want to puke or cry, but can't coz you're toughing it out for your boyz. When you are bang smack in the middle of 'Did you see that!' and 'Oh, Jesus Christ!' here's who to blame...

Blame the boy you just left for dead. Blame him for not believing you when you told him you were a bigger man than him. Blame him for not backing down when you made your chest broad, bounced into him and told him about your knife and how you would use it. Blame him for calling you on and making you prove yourself. Tell yourself if he had just freed up his phone or not cut his eyes at you like he did, he wouldn't be choking on his blood and crying for his mum.

Then blame your mum. When the police are banging down her door looking for you, or she hears the whispers behind the 'wall of silence', tell her it's all her fault for being worthless. Cuss her out for having kids when she was nothing but a kid herself, or for picking some drug or some man over you again and again. Even if she only had you and devoted herself to you, even if she is a great mum, blame her anyway. Blame her for not being around more to make sure you took the chances she was out working her fingers to the bone to give you.

When you're done with her, blame the man she picked to make you with. Blame him for being less than half the man he should have been. When he comes to bail you out and starts running you down for the terrible thing you've done, tell him straight: 'I did what I did coz you didn't do what you should have done.' Even if he did right; respected your mother, worked to provide for his family financially and spiritually, taught you right from wrong and drummed it home everyday... Even if he nurtured you as best he could, blame him for the generation of men he comes from.

The one that allowed an adolescent definition of manhood to become so dominant. The one that measures a man by how many babymothers he has wrangling his offspring, or by how 'bad' his reputation is on the streets of whatever couple of square miles he chooses to call his 'ends'.

Damn them for letting you believe that respect is to be found with gun in hand or knife in pocket. Damn them and everyone who feeds the myth of these gangsters, villains, thieves and hustlers. Anyone who makes them heroes while damning hard-working, educated, honest men as weak, sell-outs or pussies.

If you are black, blame white people for the history of indignities they heaped on you and yours. For the humiliation of having to go cap-in-hand or get down on bended knee or having to burn shit down before you are afforded something so basically fundamental as equality. If you are white, blame black folk and Muslims for taking all your excuses. Failing that, blame a class system that keeps you poor and ignorant so the 'uppers' and 'middles' can feel better about themselves.

You have good reason to blame them all. I wouldn't be you growing up now for love nor money. Your generation has so little room to manoeuvre. We had more space to step around the bullshit. We weren't excluded at the rate you lot are. Teachers hadn't given up or lost their authority over us. They still tried to protect and guide us even through our most disruptive years.

The police stopped and searched us, but we fought that right out of their hands - we hoped into extinction. But they want to bring back that abusive practice. They are still hooked on punishment rather than prevention. They seem ignorant to the fact that they are feeding you acceptance of an already prevalent gang mentality. As far as you can see, the police are not protecting and serving you, they are coming at you like just another street gang trying to boss your postcode.

When I was where you are now, generations of state agencies, social services, policy-makers and politicians had not abdicated all responsibility for me. We weren't left to our own devices like you have been. Is it any wonder that you end up expressing yourself in such a violently pathetic way?

We should be ashamed. I am. You have shamed us into a desperate need to do something about ourselves. We have collectively failed you and we should take all the blame that is ours for that... but so should you.

I blame you. I blame you because as a generation you are selfish, self-centred and have little or no empathy for anyone but yourselves. You are politically stunted and socially irresponsible and... you scare us. What scares us most is that you would rather die than learn. Your only salvation may be that still most of you aren't playing it out dirty. The vast majority of young men, even with all that is stacked against them, are finding their way around the crap. The boy you will kill, should you continue to carry that knife, almost certainly had the same collective failures testing him. He probably felt no less abandoned and no less scared. He also, almost certainly, wasn't carrying a knife.

Whatever it seems like, whatever you've read, whatever you tell yourself about protection being your reason, statistics show the life you take will be that of an unarmed person. That is what that knife will do for you. It will make you escalate a situation to where it is needed. It will give you a misguided sense of confidence. It will make you the aggressor. That knife will make you use it. It will bring you nothing worth having. There is no respect there. The street may give you some passing recognition, but any name you think you might make will soon be forgotten.

Your victim will be remembered long after you. Name me one of the boys who killed Stephen Lawrence. Once you've bloodied that knife you may as well be dead because you'll be buried for 10 to 20 years. Banged up for that long, only a fool would look back and think it was worth it. You'll be nothing more than a sad, unwanted, unnecessary statistic.

If you were mine, this is what I would tell you. I would make myself a big enough man to beg. I'd get down on bended knees if I had to. I would beg you to take that knife out of your pocket and leave it at home. I would tell you that I know you are scared and lost and that I know the risks involved in what I'm asking you to do. I know that what we could step around, you have to walk through, and that there is always some fool who isn't going to make it any other way but the wrong way. I'm just begging you not to be that fool.

Be a better man than that. Let the story they tell of you be that you exceeded expectations... that you didn't drown. Don't spend your days looking to be a 'bad-man' - try to be a good one. Our biggest failure is that our actions have left you not knowing how precious you are. We have left you unaware of your worth to us. You are precious to us. Give yourself the chance to grow enough to understand why.

Be safe.
Lennie James

Knives, young people and the law: The roller coaster of tragedy:

24 January 2007 Jevon Henry, 18, is stabbed to death in St John's Wood, north London - the first in a spate of teen-on-teen stabbings and shootings at the start of the year.

1 February 2007 Maximum sentence for carrying a knife is increased from two to four years.

22 February Church and community group leaders attend a Downing Street summit on knife crime. Tony Blair and Home Secretary John Reid promise tougher legislation, but Shadow Home Secretary David Davis says: 'This is the fourth summit on gun crimes and gangsters Tony Blair has had and at every turn the problem has got worse.'

Speaking on the same day in Manchester, David Cameron says the solution to teenage gun and knife crime is to strengthen the family: 'Gangs are crowded with boys who have never been part of an intact family, where people belonged with and to each other. The same boys may never have known the innate respect which flows from having access to a father's love and direction. They cannot survive in an emotional vacuum and their absent fathers know it.'

March 2007 Five teen-on-teen stabbings in the UK in under three weeks. Odwayne Anthony Barnes, 16, in Birmingham; Jason Spencer, 17, in Nottingham; Kodjo Yenga, 16, in Hammersmith, west London; Adam Regis, 15, in Plaistow, east London; Michael Metcalfe, 19, in Garston, near Liverpool.

19 March John Reid announces that police will now be required to record whether an incident involved a knife, telling Parliament: 'It has to involve personal and parental responsibility as well as the local community.'

27 March A one-off select committee inquiry into knife crime takes place. Martin Salter MP advises: 'We need to cut through all this nonsense and bring all the legislation together in an overarching knives and offensive weapons bill to simplify the process.'

April 2007 Blair claims that teen violence is a problem of black culture and cannot be solved 'by pretending it is not young black kids doing it'. Lee Jasper, senior adviser on equality to London Mayor Ken Livingstone says: 'The government has failed to respond to... a clear demand for additional resources to tackle youth alienation and disaffection.'

1 October 2007 The Violent Crime Reduction Act comes into force, making it illegal to sell a knife or any item with a blade or point to a person under the age of 18. Previously the age limit was 16.

1 January 2008 Henry Bolombi, 18, becomes the first teen-on-teen violence fatality of 2008; stabbed after he gets off a bus in Edmonton, north London on the way home from New Year's Eve celebrations.

February 2008 Government publishes Violent Crime Action Plan, a three-year strategy to tackle gun and knife crime including a £20m investment for interventions and information sharing between police and communities.

May 2008 A survey of 355 people aged 16 to 24 in London, Manchester and Bristol found 30 per cent said it was acceptable sometimes to carry a knife while 23 per cent would use one. One in 10 claimed to have had access to a gun.

5 May London Mayor Boris Johnson appoints Ray Lewis as his deputy for young people. Speaking at a knife crime summit in City Hall Lewis said 'We need to offer them [teenagers] outlets and guidance that will respond to their aspirations and divert them away from gangs and antisocial behaviour, whether it is sporting activities, after-school clubs or mentoring.'

24 May Harry Potter actor Robert Knox is stabbed to death outside a bar in Sidcup.

29 May A two-week campaign by police in London resulted in almost 200 knives being seized.

5 June 2008 A Downing Street summit results in the prosecution age for carrying a knife being lowered from 18 to 16.

So here's the story ...

2008-05-21T18:20:00.002+08:00

The Cannes festival is the biggest film market in the world - but what makes a producer bite? Actor Peter Capaldi on the art of the pitch.

Folks with no money and a bit of an idea have always gone to folks with a bit of money and no idea and said, How about it? It's what they call "pitching". Pitching as we know it arrived in the UK somewhere between Hugh Grant stuttering through Four Weddings and Ewan McGregor putting his head down a toilet in Trainspotting. The British film industry discovered financial success was indeed possible - as long as we all went American.

And for some, it worked. Ideas were streamlined. Enthusiasm was harnessed. The director Dylan Kidd recalls giving a vigorous pitch on a conference call; after 15 minutes he was breathless. He was flummoxed by the silence at the other end, until he discovered he'd pulled the phone from the wall and had been pitching to no one.

The American film executive exists in a corporate environment as opaque and deadly as the court of the Medicis. Despite impressive displays of intelligence and savvy, they remain bewildering people. One celebrated British playwright, when pitching an Oscar Wilde biopic, was asked if he could make Bosie a girl. The head of Fox recalls that, when pitching his updated version of Romeo and Juliet, director Baz Luhrmann did not reveal until the very last moment that he intended to retain the original Elizabethan dialogue. It was said to be the worst pitch in the history of the studio. Yet they bought it, and from it sprang one of their best films.

The British can be unpredictable, too. I once pitched three ideas to the head of Britain's top film production company. He was clearly bored by ideas one and two, but on idea three he came to life. "That is a great idea," he said. "A truly great idea." I have not heard from him since.

Sometimes the American execs will decamp to London. In a grand hotel, a lady exec sat Marie Antoinette-like through my pitch without ever moving her fingers from a bowl of paper-thin potato chips. But at least she had a democratic approach to talent: as I left I saw Tom Stoppard waiting outside, along with a bloke who sold gags to the Chuckle Brothers.

Some producers will give you stock reactions, the best of which is: "I'm intrigued." Brilliant. "How did it go?" "He was intrigued!" It satisfies everyone, bestowing upon the idea a uniqueness that is hard to test, and bathing the exec in a glow of benevolent intelligence. He didn't buy it, but it haunts him.

Some truths are self-evident.

You'd better make sure you're pitching to The Guy. I'm talking bananas here.

A second, third or fourth banana might often be the only way in, but nothing happens without the say-so of the top banana. So check your banana. What's his number? Is he in the bunch? Is he actually a banana?

My worst pitch experience was in the mid-90s. The smart British film-makers were working on Jane Austen adaptations, or heart-warming comedies about redundant coalmen who regain their dignity by dressing up as women to infiltrate Women's Institute allotments and grow marijuana to fund their sons' ballet training with hilarious and moving consequences.

I, however, with my usual sure touch, was working on an updated version of the Roger Corman sci-fi shocker, The Man With the X-Ray Eyes.

The studio was the real thing. Spence, Bogey, Astaire - they'd all walked through those gates. We were early, of course. Which became on time, which became waiting.

Eventually, the guy shows up. And he is The Guy. Banana-wise, he's in the big yellow penthouse at the top of the banana-shaped Chrysler building looking down on all the other bananas, far, far below, in the streets of Bananahattan.

At that time, all studio heads were called Larry, Barry, or sometimes Gary. Larry, Barry or Gary looks like Kris Kristofferson, as rendered in wax, in a not-too-shabby country music wax museum. Fresh from Sundance, he is still roughing it in a voluminous oat-coloured cardigan and faded but very expensive denim shirt and jeans.

I launch into my pitch. It's post-Desert Storm I. Sensitive jarhead (River Phoenix or Leonardo DiCaprio or maybe David Schwimmer in a breakthrough serious role) returns home to Walton Mountain, suffering from bizarre sight problems, which eventually mutate into full-blown x-ray vision. High points included the obligatory seeing-through-the-waitress's-uniform scene (the girl from Species, I thought, in Agent Provocateur), to watching an aneurism blow in someone's brain, and eventually seeing through skin, cars, walls, buildings, mountains, the planet and universe into a new and terrifying dimension. What's not to like? Larry, Barry or Gary's eyes reveal nothing. Unlike Kris Kristofferson's, they are dead.

Keep going. As in the original, this is a journey into madness. River/Leonardo/maybe David Schwimmer in a breakthrough serious role discovers that he and his platoon have been experimented on in Iraq by the US military, which is looking to create soldier/robot hybrids. X-ray vision apparatus has been implanted into the soldiers' brains. His only choice is to track down the doctor who did the experiments and see if they can be reversed.

Not a flicker of emotion from The Guy. Now I'm feeling faint, and where his eyes are I'm seeing a cheap Roger Corman effects shot: almond-shaped card pasted over them, on to which angry flames are superimposed. I am hit with a desire of frightening power and vividness: I want to go home. Not to the hotel, not to London and my family. I want to get on a plane and go home to Scotland. To my mother. Just to be loved unconditionally.

I then heard myself say: "And we know he's in trouble because the doctor is played by Chris Walken." The eyes remained impassive, although to me they were now displaying a raging volcanic inferno. And then Larry, Barry or Gary spoke. "Chris Walken?" he said. I nodded. Without a word he got up, turned around, and walked out of the room.

The rest is a blur. I remember only blistering sunshine, lots of alcohol, and finding myself face down on the pavement, where, this being Hollywood, I was still looking up at the stars.

Of course, our film was never made. Not for the reasons you might think: some months after the pitch, the great Tim Burton announced he was doing The Man With the X-Ray Eyes for a rival studio, so all bets were off. The funny thing was, in the interim, we got the gig: a script was commissioned and we were all paid handsomely. Apparently, Larry, Barry or Garry loved it.

By Peter Capaldi in the Guardian on Wednesday May 21, 2008

Jack's Dilemma

2008-04-22T17:55:00.003+08:00

It's the semi-finals of the Champions League and while Barcelona take on Man Utd in tomorrow's semi-final, tonight sees Chelsea take on Liverpool.

A game that has always divided the Robinson/Hargreaves household.

So what's poor Jack to do ...

p-p-p-ick up a p-p-penguin

2008-04-22T10:02:00.000+08:00

Check out the digital fiction Penguin:

Six authors. Six stories. Six weeks. Nuff said.

Jack's Open House

2008-03-28T16:46:00.000+08:00

R.T.F.L.

2008-01-22T18:49:00.000+08:00

I felt rough towards the end of the last week and, after promising Sarah that if I did not feel better by Monday that I would see the quack, I duly went to see the doctor yesterday. She said that I had a touch of bronchitis and the flu - and prescribed some antibiotics, as well as signing me of until Wednesday.

I took two pills yesterday lunchtime and it knocked me for six. Ended up cat-napping from 2 to 6pm! Took another two last night after eating and, again, was cream crackered by 9 and so went to bed early.

Still felt fluey this am so did not attempt to go back to work. But it was only after taking another two pills at lunchtime (which sent me to night-night-bye-byes for a couple of hours), that I bothered to read the label. It stated 'take one pill twice a day'!

That will teach me to R.T.F.L in future!

Note to Self: 'Stop Reading - And Get Writing!'

2008-01-09T18:07:00.000+08:00

“We've inherited the idea that stew is cheap, nourishing and virtuous. We start with an outsized cauldron, a load of cheap meat and veg and keep adding ingredients until it looks right. Nothing beats that Little House on the Prairie feeling that you've made enough food to feed everyone on the homestead through a cruel winter - nothing except the realisation that there are only two of you, in a suburban semi and that you'd probably rather eat the dog than another bowl of stew.”

I have just spent the past hour reading Tim Hayward articles – and they all contain some brilliant pearls – as demonstrated above.

It just reminds me that I need to get writing myself!

2007-12-27T16:12:00.000+08:00

Some choice words from The Guardian's Harry Pearson:
'Fabio Capello has his first meeting with John Terry and the England squad. The initial reaction is positive: "His English is rudimentary, he doesn't know many words, but he gets his point across forcibly." And the Italian's comments about the other players are equally complimentary.'

Patronising, embarrassing, lurid - the high street stores have got their Christmas ads all wrong

2007-12-18T16:13:00.000+08:00

A quality article from Charlie Brooker in The Guardian:

It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas. Well, on TV it is anyway. At this time of year, every ad break turns into an extended brainwashing exercise as one campaign after another hammers its way into your head by dint of sheer repetition alone.

"It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas" is, of course, the theme song of this year's offering from Argos, which affects solidarity with the average hard-shopping prole by depicting the high street as a hellish dog-eat-dog war zone straight out of Saving Private Ryan, the only thing missing being the occasional eye-popping shot of a young soldier getting his leg blown off - which, to be fair, wouldn't really be in keeping with the Yuletide spirit.

Stephen Fry's voiceover complains that Christmas should be "more ... well, Christmassy", at which point it cuts to a shot of an Argos delivery van pulling up outside a suburban home, as though that's the very essence of all things "Christmassy", which it isn't. The birth of Christ, a crowded train, a party-hatted boss drunkenly molesting a co-worker - that's Christmassy, you idiots.

Apart from Boots, whose "Here Come the Girls" celebration-of-vapidity is at least entertaining, all the high street stores seem to have got it a bit wrong this year. Iceland's ads are the most lurid, as they continue to hawk an increasingly terrifying range of oven-ready vol-au-vents (Loaded Prawns, Filo Parcels, Squirrel-and-Onion Swastikas and so on) using the dream-team combo of Kerry Katona and a Nolan sister. These ads precisely evoke the queasy sensation of drifting off in front of a bloated 90-minute festive edition of Birds of a Feather following an over-rich pudding and three Baileys too many. And maybe that's the point.

Celebrities feature heavily in supermarket ads. Asda continues its intensely patronising "stars in the aisles" campaign, in which well-loved faces slum it among the downtrodden workforce. Sainsbury's dumps Jamie Oliver into a sort of Dickensian pop-up book filled with miniature slaves. Morrisons has really dropped the ball, with an excruciating advert called "Lulu's Christmas Dream", in which Lulu wanders through a cosy, snow-caked market town peopled exclusively by a baffling combination of minor celebrities. There's Gabby Logan carving her turkey, Nick Hancock having a snowball fight, Denise van Outen giggling on a balcony, Diarmuid Gavin winking at Lulu as though recalling a particularly grubby one-night stand, and Alan Hansen filling his trolley with 500 tins of Miniature Heroes, all of it backed by Take That's Shine. It's like a low-rent Ocean's Thirteen. If it had used Alan Partridge instead of Lulu, and (I Believe in Miracles) You Sexy Thing by Hot Chocolate instead of Take That, it could have been the best Christmas commercial ever. As it is, it's just embarrassing.

Speaking of embarrassments, the Spice Girls have managed to imbue their long-awaited comeback with all the glamour and class of a hurried crap in a service station toilet by whoring themselves out to Tesco. The first instalment, in which the Girl Power quartet try to hide from each other while shopping for presents, represents a important landmark for the performing arts: Posh Spice becomes the first human being in history to be out-acted by a shopping trolley.

Marks & Sparks win a nerd rosette from me for managing to authentically replicate the style and tone of late-50s/early-60s movie trailers, although the undertone of its commercial is a tad suspect: it took me three or four viewings to realise it, but Twiggy and co are desperately showing off in a bid to impress Antonio Banderas, who looks a bit like a CEO in a brothel trying to decide which prostitute he fancies using. I keep expecting him to point out two of them at the end, and for the advert to cut suddenly to a grotesque scene where both of them pleasure him at once in a velvet boudoir, filmed in the same style as the slow-mo food porn it uses for its other commercials. All of which isn't very Christmassy either. But maybe that's just me.

Said ad is accompanied by yet another vintage song: It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year. Presumably the ad agencies hold some sort of summit each year in the run-up to Christmas, where they negotiate who has the right to use each track, just so there's no duplication. "You can have Winter Wonderland provided we get to keep Wizzard." That kind of thing. Old-fashioned crooning is in vogue this year. I'm expecting the Bing Crosby/David Bowie take on Little Drummer Boy to make an appearance next time round - in a Currys ad, accompanying a shot of a wireless inkjet printer or something. You know. In keeping with the original sentiment of the song.

Using Your Emotions To Negotiate

2007-12-12T15:08:00.000+08:00

I can’t say that I have ever been into (or actually read) any self-help or motivational books, but I came across this quote today: ‘Status elevates both our self esteem and the esteem with which others view us. Everyone wants to feel like ‘someone’ – ie a force to be reckoned with, a voice worth heeding, a person to know. Whether it’s because of our training, accomplishments, family background, job or position in our company, we’re likely to enjoy having a lofty status that is recognized by others and by ourselves.’

It’s from a book called ‘Beyond Reason’ – which promises to reveal how to ‘use emotions to turn disagreements - big or small, personal or professional - into an opportunity for mutual gain.’

The next time I’m stuck for a book to buy a Borders or Changi Airport, I think I may get a copy. Unless, of course, Santa’s reading this blog entry and puts it in my stocking for Crimbo . . .

Last Friday

2007-10-03T17:14:00.000+08:00

Last Friday, I played in an ad agency 5-a-side tournament. To find out how my team and I got on, click here. Or, if you've got really good eyes, you might be able to read this:

Ever wondered why you never hear of anyone robbing a bank in Sinagpore?

2007-08-07T18:04:00.000+08:00

Sarah started her MBA course at Nanyang Technology University last week and, as the first tranche of payments were due, she asked me to transfer some money from bank (UOB) to hers (HSBC).

After having some fun and games trying to get the transfer done via the telephone, I was advised by to go down in person to my bank.

So on Friday lunchtime, I strolled down the road to UOB. After only queuing for 15 minutes, I was in. Or, to be specific, I was at Cashier No. 6 – who had the biggest smile I had ever seen.

I duly explained to the person behind the jump that I needed to transfer some money to wife’s bank and passed her a note with all of Sarah’s bank details (e.g. account name, number, bank, etc).

The teller then started to fill in a form and, just as started to think about what to have for my lunch, she stopped and said ‘I’m sorry, Sir, but we’re UOB and your wife’s account is with HSBC’.

‘I know, ‘ replied yours truly. [You have to get up earlier than that to catch me out, I thought.]

‘Well, we could do a Telegraphic Transfer’ said the teller, helpfully.

‘And what will that cost me?’[See the comment above in square brackets.]

‘$15, sir.’

‘Sod that.’

‘Sorry, sir?’

‘It’s ok. I’ll pay it in myself. So can I just have the money in cash and I’ll go to HSBC.’

So with a pocket full of used notes in large denominations, I braved the 32 degree Celsius heat outside and strolled the 2km to HSBC. Once there, I took a ticket and waited for my turn.

There was an interesting programme on the plasma TV screen installed to keep all the queuing punters happy. It was in Chinese, but from the images being shown, it was all about some automated milking machine. And was pretty graphic. So much so, that after seeing yet another poor cow have her udders manhandled by robo-suck, I didn’t fancy lunch any more.

It wasn’t long before it was my turn to provide to be milked.

‘I’d like to put some money into my wife’s account, please’.

‘Certainly, sir’ replied the grinning cashier, who had the largest smile I had seen since the one down at UOB.

I dug out the cash and placed that in front of the cashier and then the note with all of Sarah’s bank details. The cashier picked up the note and started to enter details into her keyboard.

‘And how much are you depositing, sir?’

‘$10,000.’

‘And can I ask where did the money come from?’

‘From me’ said I. [She would have to get up even earlier than the UOB cashier to catch me out, I thought].

‘And where did you get the money from sir?’

‘My bank.’ And with that, I showed her the receipt from UOB.

‘Thank you ‘ replied Smiley.’ I just need to know what will your wife do with the money?’

‘Jesus!’

‘Sorry?’

‘Err for savings and spending’ I said. [I was worried that if I had mentioned the MBA course, that I would have been there all day]

‘Thank you, sir,’ she said. ‘I will just need to seek authorisation from my supervisor’. And, leaving all of the money untouched, she disappeared into an office at the back.

[Now, I know that I may have looked a bit hot and sweaty (it was 32 degrees outside) and I did have bundle of cash (with a receipt from my bank) – but what did she need authorisation for? To accept used notes from a dodgy-looking customer, whose shirt was dripping in sweat?]

After about 5 minutes, she reappeared and said that she had been given permission to bank the cash. She counted the money, gave me a receipt and I was on my way back to the office.

No wonder you never hear of bank robberies in Singapore. For if it’s that difficult to put money into a bank, just how imagine how hard it to steal it!

Gerry Kane R.I.P.

2007-08-04T23:38:00.000+08:00

A very good pal, Gerry Kane, passed away last weekend. He was only thirty-eight.

Thankfully I got to see him on the day before he passed away. It's so hard to say goodbye to someone knowing that you'll never get to see them again. Especially to someone so young.

But Gerry was unbelievable. Happy, chatting and cracking jokes with everyone.

He was even strong enough to hang on until his family flew in from Perth at 6am last Saturday, before he passed away at 2pm.

Even at 1pm he was still sending texts to people. Could you do that? 60 minutes before you met your maker?

Gerry Kane: Loving husband, property and investment guru, (professional) golfer, bullshit artiste and damn good bloke!

A service was held for Gerry last Monday and you can see that by clicking here.

It's been a while..

2007-01-19T11:38:00.000+08:00

But this made me laugh:

I parked my car in a space reserved for the Disabled. And this jobs’ worth of a traffic warden shouts over to me:
‘Oi! You can’t park there. What’s your disability?’
‘Tourette’s, you prick! Now fuck off!’, says I.

You can't make this stuff up...

2006-07-03T19:27:00.000+09:00

This ‘joke de la jour’ is taken a forum on ExpatSingapore – where one can find answers to the burning issues on life as an expat in Singapore (e.g. where your maid goes to on a Sunday, why you can never get a taxi in the rush hour and where to find the best laksa/pepper crab/chicken rice in Singapore):

Q: I'm interested in buying a modest apartment in Singapore to avoid wasting money on rent. Can anyone advise what sort of money I could expect to pay?
A. I would expect you would pay in Singapore dollars.

Quality response! It’s up there with:

Q: I'm interested in learning to play the Spanish Guitar. Can anyone advise where I can get lessons?
A. Spain?

Normal Service Will Be Resumed

2006-04-23T16:17:00.000+09:00

What with the wedding, work and other bits and pieces, I haven't entered anything from ages. But will get back into the swing of things this week.

Firstly, though, Sarah, who's off to Shanghai shortly, has given me a tonne of pix to post up on the wedding site. So that's the next two hours sorted.

And then, at 5:30, I get to watch the Liverpool - Chelsea semi-final from yesterdau. Although the game was played at 12:15 this am, I had had a very long day yesterday so decided to avoid the result and watch it while Sarah is on her plane to Chelsea.

Actually, speaking of football, yesterday I got roped in by old football team, Pulau Ubin, to 'appear' in a Tiger Beer commercial. Basically, we got to pretend that we were footballers, drink beer and get paid for it.

Once the ad hits the TV screens, I will be sure to pass you the url to have a butcher's at our football/acting/extra skills.

Some Golden Rules When Writing

2006-02-24T16:32:00.000+08:00

What am I trying to say?
What words will express it?
What image or idiom will make it clearer?
Is this image fresh enough to have effect?
Can I put it more succinctly?
Have I said anything that is unavoidably ugly?

The Hargreaves Have Landed

2006-02-06T15:03:00.000+08:00

Sarah’s folks (Pete and Pam) arrived on Weds 18 Jan for their annual visit. To date, their stay has gone something like:
19.01: ??
20.01: Took them to a (great) Chinese restaurant (Hua Zhu) in Farrer Rd
21.01: Took them to a (disappointing) Brazilian restaurant in 6th Avenue
22-24.01: Jan Took (and left) them to Desaru, Malaysia. [Played golf with Pete on the Sunday and shot a 96 – my first sub*century game]
25.01: Jan Eats at ours as Sarah was back from Japan & Korea
26.01:??
27.01: Took them to Coolies in the afternoon and back to Hua Zhu in the evening
28.01: Had a bbq at ours and met up with Kev & Jayne, Nicole and Sandy
29.01: Took Spent the day and night at the Ritz-Cartlton for Pam’s B’day – and to watch the (great) Chinese New Year fireworks
30.01: ??
31.01: Took Pete to Batam for some golf with some of the Coolies boyz. [Normal service was resumed with Pete shooting 90 and me 103]
01.02: ??
02.02: Met Pete and Pam at Coolies to pay for golf and had a couple of beers
03:.02: Sarah had the day off and took her folks to Johor Bahru (across the causeway in Malaysia) for a visa run for her mum and to do some shopping. In the evening they went to the Chingay Festival.
04.02: Pete cam to his first Coolies’ golf day and ended up strolling in at 3 am! [After the golf we went to Est and Andrew’s for some eats and vino, and watched the rugby at 1am]
05.02: We all went down to Tanglin for some 9*hole pitch and putt fun. After a quick beer at Demspey’s Hut, it was back to chez nous for some nice eats with Gary and Fiona, and Mark.
06.02: Bad start to the day with Liverpool losing to Chelsea – despite having the better of the first half. Doesn’t help that all the Hargreaves are Blues fans!

In the news

2006-01-19T11:21:00.000+08:00

Ugly mug shot, I know but my appointment at Tequila made Marketing Magazine.

Raining geckos and bull-frogs

2006-01-13T12:44:00.000+08:00

It has rained everyday since we got back from Oz (Mon 2 Jan). So much so, that the so-called IT super highway was flooded and so I was unable to update my blog. Well, the truth was that I have been busy with other things (like a new job, footy, entertaining etc) but thought that the above excuse sounded better. Besides, there must be something about Seasonal Affective Disorder 'cos when its dark, miserable and wet, you don't fancy doing much.

Anyway, the sun has got its hat on in Singapore today (for the first time since Dec 23 apparently) so thought that was worth shouting about.

Tonight am off to some Chivas Regal bash at the Esplanade (Singapore's attempt to mimic the Sydney Opera House). A free entry and free flow alcohol usually secures my attendance at most places. Tomorrow its golf with Coolies and Sunday, we are mtg up with Fiona and Gary (who we went to W.Australia with) for some local eats and Margaret River vinos.

And on Sunday, I will stick some pix from Darwin, Alice Springs and Ayers Rock up on the site. May even stick a pick of Sarah's new rock up here too!

Which reminds me, we need to decide on where to get married. And when. And how....

Be sure to visit TamaHouse !

2005-12-15T11:40:00.000+08:00

Check out Elaine's site, www.tamahouse.com.

[Elaine is my colleague at Grip and helps to keep me sane when all that yucky stuff starts to hit the crowds]

It's all Elaine's work and if you need a quirky multi-media designer, drop her a line!

Sporting Quotes of the Fortnight

2005-12-15T11:37:00.000+08:00

"If you take the scrum out of the equation, we played well."
Former Australia coach Eddie Jones, defending the Wallabies' defeat by England.

"If you take the assassination out of the equation, the President and Mrs Kennedy quite enjoyed the drive from Dallas to the airport."
Mike Carlton (Australian broadcaster) disagrees.

Keeping a diary / blog is easy…

2005-12-15T11:32:00.000+08:00

It’s remembering to update it that’s the tricky bit!

In the past month since my last entry, I have omitted to add stuff about:
- the Coolies Golf Tour to Chiang Mai (three days of golf, art galleries and water-painting classes with the lads);
- my birthday weekend (spent a night at the luxurious Sentosa hotel and ate some great seafood at The Cliff);
- Jaffy being spayed at the vets – and recovering very well;
- my resignation from Grip as I start at Tequila on Tues 3 Jan – which I am v. excited about; and
Our trip to Darwin over Xmas / New Year.

But will do at some stage.

Plus, for the first time ever, I will actually publish my New Year’s resolutions – in a half attempt at helping me to actually reach / keep them!

And while I recall, thanks to Holly and Hugh for the posh notebook that arrived in the post last week. Though there was no covering note so am assuming it was you guys! [I also rec’d a Stereo MCs CD through the post – that had no covering note but was signed ‘Peace - Rob’ on the case. After asking around to see who sent it, I found out that I had won it after registering at their site and that the scrawls on the front were the band’s signatures!]

Perth, WA

2005-11-15T12:09:00.000+08:00

While I recall, our trip to Oz went something like this:

On Saturday, we flew to Perth, took a short mini-bus journey and arrived at our (Comfort!) hotel 1:30am

On Sunday, we were up for brekky by 9 and then strolled around Perth and its shops. [For hours!]. Though must say that King’s Park – which overlooks the Swan River and Perth – is a great spot for a picnic, beer and the Sunday papers. Back to our hotel to collect our bags and then took the free tram to the train station to catch the train to Fremantle (30 min ride). After dropping our bags off at our B+B, we strolled around the seaside town and was glad to have packed a fleece and a baseball cap, as it got a bit chilly at night! Ate at a posh Indian.

On Monday, we took the ferry over to Rottnest Island – where we cycled around, stopped off at some beaches, Sarah took some pix, had some wine and pasty for lunch, Sarah took some more pix and saw some cute quokkas (2 foot long marsupials – that are half-responsible for the island’s name as some Dutch explorer thought that they were rats – well he was two miles off shore at the time!).
We aught the ferry back and met up with Gary and Fiona (two Melbournites that live in Singapore) – for a drive down to Rockingham (about an hour or so drive away).

Rockingham is a proper seaside town – with small pier, promenade, etc – and I think it’s where the oldies go to retire as the whole place was deserted and practically closed up by 9pm! We managed to squeeze into an Italian – run by a guy from Jersey – and while the gals ordered, Gary and I snuck in a couple of Aussie ales in a Pub/TAB - where you can drink and place a bet at the same time.

Tuesday – up at 7 to go swimming with dolphins! Basically you get on a small boat, sail out to the middle of the bay / Indian Ocean, slip on a wet suit (ok ‘slip’ may not be the best term to use when trying to squeeze into a wet suit but it will do for now) and when our guides saw a pod of dolphins, they’d tell us all to ‘Go,Go,Go’. And then we’d all scramble into the water (which was f…f…f….f….. freezing by the way) with our snorkel and goggle and hang onto the belt of the person in front of you, while at the head of each crocodile of would-be snorkels and dolphin-spotters, was a trained guide with a handy device that would propel us along in the water.

The dolphins – which were all wild – would then appear beside you, underneath you, behind you – and almost at touching distance. It was liking watching some Attenborough sea-life program – though with the odd jet of frozen water squirming down your back to make you realise that you weren’t watching the dolphins through a state-of-the-art flat-screen TV. That and the fact that you occasionally swallowed some sea water.

On the ride back to shore – with some hot drinks inside us –the dolphins zipped in and out of the water, showing off as they tried to race us back.

Absolutely awesome experience. Especially as our guides did not feed the dolphins – and that it was simply up to the dolphins if they wanted to play.

That afternoon, we drove off to Dunsborough, which is in the heart of the Margaret River wine region. We booked a seaside cottage through the very helpful Tourist Office, grabbed some provisions and headed off to our home for the next four nights.

The place was very nice – just two minutes from the sea – and was equipped with everything you need – barbie, cooker, microwave, two bathrooms, TV, sofas, open fire…Gary was on fire-duty every evening, while I volunteered for the cooking role.

The next day we drove out to around a dozen local vineyards – will have to ask Sarah for a list of their names as they all kind of blended into one after a while. Especially after all the wine-tasting we did along the way. [Though, must admit, I prefer the term ‘wine-drinking’ to ‘wine-tasting’ as the latter implies swirling the stuff around in your glass and mouth, and then usually spitting it out!]

On, Thursday we gave Gary a day off from driving and went on a BushTucker Tour of some different vineyard. Basically we climbed aboard a mini-bus, got off at loads of vineyards, a cheese producer, a chocolate maker… Anyway, needless to say we drank loads, brought loads and had a good day.

On the way home, Sarah had still to see any kangaroos – apart from the one that was served up for lunch – so our driver, Stevo, went out of his way to find some. And I showed by bush tucker skills by whistling to get a ‘roo (just one of many ‘technical’ terms I collected along the trip) to stand up and look towards us so that Sarah could take a snap of him

Friday was supposed to be golf for the boys and whale-watching for the gal but the stormy weather soon put paid to our plans. So the boys hit the pub, while the girls went shopping.

Saturday was an early start as we drove back to Perth. Gary and Fiona stayed on another night, whilst we flew back home. [And, I must say, Qantas looked after us on the way back as they must have given me alone like 6 quarter bottles of wine!]

Overall, a nice, relaxing trip and we have loads of pix (which I'll stick up shortly), vino and other nice gourmet bits and bobs to remind us.

A Big IOU

2005-11-09T10:39:00.000+08:00

Apologies - but have been pretty slack in updating this blog but will do so by the weekend. Among other things, I need to ceover:
- Perth (vineyards, swimming with the dolphins, vineyards and more vineyards)
- A Day At The Races (Sarah's top tipster)
- The Ballet (Romeo & Juliet by the Imperial Russian Ballet)
- Chelsea lose a game (or two!)

And other stuff and nonsense. Honest!

Reader, we kept her!

2005-11-09T10:34:00.000+08:00

In the end, despite all the wise words and wisdom proffered, we decided to keep young Jaffy.

The logic being .. that there was no logic but that it was hard to turn away a cute, furry thang - especially one with a long tail (which is quite a rare thing in Singapore) and one that likes company. And, which I discovered the other day, is not impartial to the odd basil and tomato sausage and certainly has never said no to any pan-fried salmon. Besides, it's nice to have a fellow meat/fish eater in the house - even though she does have more legs than me and gets away with hogging the bed more than I'd ever be allowed to!

Anyway, will place some pix of Jaffy here soon. Along with some of 'Before Jaffy, After Jaffy' pictures of our furniture, the flat, etc

What to do with Jaffy? You decide...

2005-10-08T20:33:00.000+08:00

As you may be aware, we have spent the past week looking after Jaffy, a stray cat found near the Thai Embassy in Orchard Rd.

And this is the afore-mentioned Jaffy:

At first the plan was just to look after her (or I think it's a her) while the person who 'found' her, Pete, returned from his trip to Malaysia and found a full-time home for her.

[Now Pete has a habit of picking up all sort of strays (cats, dogs, snakes... you name it, he's probably had them) - which is a pretty noble / samaritan thing to do, I agree. But when he realises that he has no more room to extend his zoological collection, and invariably has to use,to quote a popular 4-piece combo, aka Oasis, "some might say", emotional blackmail to off-load his new-found furry (and, sometimes, scaly) friends to others, then maybe he should have left them where they were.]

The thing is, that Sarah, on her travels, went to the Thai Embassy and not only saw Jaffy's mum but all her (as in Jaffy's and not Sarah's) siblings too. [They all have similar markings and, unusually for Singaporean cats, full length tails]. Sarah also gleaned from the Thai Embassy security guard that the cats there were fed and well looked after by all the staff at the Embassy.

Sarah then decided, quite righly in my book, that the best thing to do was to return Jaffy back to her family (once again, I mean Jaffy's and not Sarah's).

That was until, Pete (ditto: Jaffy's side of the house rather than Sarah's) had heard of our plans to reacquaint Jaffy with her family and said that he would take Jaffy back, pronto.

Now, if Jaffy was an abandoned stray and one that would have a rough life if returned back to her home, then Pete taking her back (or us keeping her) would not be a problem. But when you know that Jaffy had a nice place to cat-nap (the Thai Embassy has nice gardens, is staffed 24/7 and is mighty handy for the shops in Orchard Road), then maybe the best thing is to return her to the Thai Embassy.

Or should we? Cast your vote - and leave your comments below. The poll will close on Wednesday and whatever you decide will determine the fate of Jaffy.

[Despite my web/html background, I cannot for the life of me sort out the gap that appears between here and the poll, so, until some bright spark gives me a clue, you'll have to scroll down a tad. Soz. D]

And it’s goodnight from him

2005-10-05T11:32:00.000+08:00

Ronnie Barker died yesterday – which is a massive shame / loss. The guy was a pure comic genius – both in his acting and in his writing.

Here are just a few of his pearls - c/o the Guardian:

"The search for the man who terrorises nudist camps with a bacon slicer goes on. Inspector Lemuel Jones had a tip-off this morning, but hopes to be back on duty tomorrow."

"Have you heard the one about the retired general who said he had not had sex since 1956? His friend said, 'That's a long time ago.' 'I don't know,' the general replied. 'It's only 20.27 now."
A famous Spoonerism from Open All Hours: "Don't just crit their siticising".

To his assistant Granville (David Jason) who is toying nervously with the cash register in Open All Hours: "Come on, you aren't there to play the Warsaw Concerto."

As Fletcher in Porridge, when playing monopoly: "Would you Adam and Eve it? Go to jail!"

Again from Porridge: "What have I learned, Mr Mackay? Three things. One - bide your time. Two - keep your nose clean. And three - don't let the bastards grind you down."

"There was a strange happening during a performance of Elgar's Sea Pictures at a concert hall in Bermuda tonight, when the man playing the triangle disappeared."

"Next week we'll be investigating rumours that the president of the dairy council has become a Mason, and goes around giving his colleagues the secret milkshake."

"We'll continue our investigation into the political beliefs of nudists. We've already noticed a definite swing to the left."

"The man who invented the zip fastener was today honoured with a lifetime peerage. He will now be known as the Lord of the Flies."

"The toilets at a local police station have been stolen. Police say they have nothing to go on."

"In a packed programme tonight we will be talking to an out-of-work contortionist who says he can no longer make ends meet."

"The prime minister held a meeting with the cabinet today. He also spoke to the bookcase and argued with the chest of drawers."

"Following the dispute with the domestic servants' union at Buckingham Palace today, the Queen, a radiant figure in a white silk gown and crimson robe, swept down the main staircase and through the hall. She then dusted the cloakroom and vacuumed the lounge."

"The West Drayton man who has kept himself awake every night for 17 years by snoring has at least found the answer. He's going to sleep in another room."

Furry Friends

2005-10-04T12:25:00.000+08:00

Tonight we pick up a little house guest. She’s 3-months old, called Jaffy (due to her jaffa cake markings) and was ‘found’ in Orchard Road by Pete, who’s a friend of our neighbour, Nicole.

Pete has ‘found a number of animals on his travels – from cats to dogs, snakes to rabbits. Which is very charitable and noble – but he usually picks up too many for his place and then asks if anyone else wants a cat!

The thing is, is that there are loads of stray cats around Singapore if you want to go looking for them. [Eg By the post office or Cold Storage in Holland Village. They are fed by locals and all have a semi-decent place to live in and run around.

So am not really sure that turning a semi-feral cat into a domesticated moggy (and one that is kept in a flat all the time ) is really the right thing to do.

Anyway, we’ll look after Jaffy and I will have to make sure that Sarah does not get too attached to her – especially as we are off to Perth for a week on the 15th!

Re Sunday

2005-10-04T12:16:00.000+08:00

Re: Sunday’s game. I don’t think that the scoreline (1-4) was a true reflection of the game. Just that Chelsea did not really put a foot wrong and bided their time until Liverpool did!

Jimmy Trarore’s lunge on Drogba was very clumsy and an obvious penalty. But then I thought that there were two deffo penalties for Liverpool in the game on Weds. Still they’re not a penalty until the ref gives them. And the goal from a throw-in was schoolboy stuff.

Still – we get to play them again at least twice more this season and hopefully we can defend a bit better, while getting some breaks at the other end of the pitch.

[If there’s a future’s betting market – Carvalho must be a good bet to concede the first pen as he has gotten away with a few against Liverpool to date]

Referee!

2005-09-29T10:16:00.000+08:00

Cannot believe that the ref this am failed to award Liverpool at least one penalty.

Drogba’s ‘challenge’ on Hypia in the first half would have merited a free-kick anywhere else on the pitch; as would have Gallas’ ‘ball-to-hand’ antics in the second.

Still a point is a point and, hopefully, both teams will have qualified for the next phase by the time that they meet in the CL again. Otherwise, the game (which is the last one in the Group) will be v.interesting!

Game On...

2005-09-28T13:27:00.000+08:00

On paper, you’d have to say that Chelsea were clear favourites to win tonight’s game against Liverpool in the Champions League (and probably again in the Premiership game on Sunday).

With their keeper, defence, midfield, wingers and attack – they have quality and consistency all over the park. And the way that they have continued from last season – with 7 straight wins and only 1 goal conceded – you’d think that they only need to turn up to win.

However, as we all know, the game is not played on paper and, what with the ball being round and the officials being human(ish), the best teams does not always win on the day.

My head says that Chelsea will nick it 1-0; while the heart says 2-0 to Liverpool. Should be a cracking game all the same – and here’s to the heart winning over the head!

Horse-some

2005-09-15T17:45:00.000+09:00

How horsesome is this site? [You will need Flash. Then click on each horse and ensure that the sound is on]

The Flying Pickets: eat your hearts out!

It's the Dog's Mate!

2005-09-15T17:00:00.000+09:00

If you get a moment, take a look a this site. The 'Speed Date' one is funny but the one that takes the (doggie) biscuit is the 'Keep it Pure' one.

And, this short film from the BBC website is absolute quality too.

Gentlemen Only, Ladies Forbidden*

2005-09-13T13:37:00.000+09:00

I pretty much had a golf-tastic weekend. And also introduced my brother, Ivor, to the game.

On Saturday, I took Ivor to Tering Bay in Batam, Indonesia, with the rest of the Coolies Centurions Golf Club.

Not only was it his first trip to Asia but it was also his first ever round of golf. He played well – hit some good shots and, I think that by the end of the day, he was hooked by the sport.

And on Sunday, Sarah managed to blag some VIP Hospitality passes to the Singapore Open. So the three of us popped over to Sentosa and followed the likes of Adam Scott and Lee Westwood around the course. Before we took full advantage of the free eats and drinks in the World Sports Group Hospitality tent!

*An old wife’s (or should that read husband’s?) tale that ‘golf’ is an acronym for 'Gentlemen Only, Ladies Forbidden'. In fact, the word is derived from a medieval Dutch word 'kolf' or 'kolve' which meant 'club', which was passed on to the Scots, who, with their dialect/brogue, transformed into "golve," "gowl" or "gouf."

Another Busy Fortnight Ahead

2005-09-06T12:37:00.000+09:00

Holly’s been staying with us for the past fortnight, which has been nice. Though having pals in town does invariably mean late nights and eating & drinking far too well, plus there’s the small matter of trying to fit school in as well.

After brunching it at the Ritz Carlton on Sunday, Sarah and Holly flew up to KL yesterday: Sarah to attend the Global Leadership Forum (where the speakers range from the first man on the moon to the first winner of the Apprentice) and Holly to shop and crash on Sarah’s floor.

And today, my brother, Ivor, arrives in town for a fortnight. So not much rest for the wicked, eh? Am pretty sure that he’ll be happy as Larry sunning himself by the pool during the day, while I’m at work. Then come the evening, I will have to drag him around the island sampling the odd local beer and dish as we go. [Though, on Saturdy, we’ll both be off on a Centurions’ Golf Day at Tering Bay – so at least Sarah will get the place to herself – until Holly gets back from Vietnam on the Sunday!]

And on top of that, I am busy looking for a new job – so will have to be on the ball on as well!

Still, all good fun all the same. And am sure that it will be worth in the end!

Write it and they shall come...?

2005-08-28T23:56:00.000+09:00

To help in my quest to land a copywriting role with a larger Advertising Agency (one where I can earn and learn), I have cobbled together this ad, which is based on a classic press ad by John Caples.

Watch this space to see if it leads to something!

Designs on Life......

2005-08-18T13:19:00.000+09:00

Ok, Pentagram’s web site is not the best in the world, but how cool is their work? When I grow up / come back in another life / win the lottery I would love to work for them (as am sure that a cool design company must need a decent copywriter every now and then) or get them to do some work for me.

In the meantime, I’ll just carry on dreaming, trying to be good in this life and buying those lottery tickets!

About Last pm / This am

2005-07-29T12:10:00.000+09:00

On a scale of 1 to 10, where 1 is a lager top and 10 is a flaming Lamborghini, I think that, in a Fat Boy Slim styleee (as in right here, right now), I am pretty much a snake-bite and black after last night / this am.

Firstly there was a beer to with Beer Cellar Utd FC to celebrate the fact that we had won the EspZen league and then it was back to Dave’s (Coolies’ Centurion golfer) for a nitecap. Before deciding, at 4:30 am, that it would be nice to go and meet at Sarah at the airport, as her flight was getting in from NY at 6:30.

Nice gesture, I am, sure you’ll agree. Though half my thinking was that a) I could grab a maccy d’s there and b) I was no doubt going to get awoken anyway when she strolled in at 7’ish, so may as well get some browny points with my hash browns.

However, whilst looking at the flight indicator board, I saw a flight that had just landed in from NY (out of Newark, which, we all know is an anagram of an onanist) – at 5:30, while another one was due in 6:24.

Before, I stumbled off for my egg mcmuffin brekky, I thought that I should just sms madam to see if her flight had landed . And, as if my magic, she replied straight away that she was just clearing customs. And when I looked up, she was there. So forewent (if that’s such a word) the brekky and met the missus.

And, even though she had just endured an 18 hour flight from the states, Sarah was full of the joys of spring. While my ‘beer’ had made me somewhat tired and getting up this am was an awful struggle!

Still – get through to lunchtime and I am sure that I can wing it from there!

2005-07-22T18:15:00.001+09:00

I'm sure the ball came over this way somewhere..

2005-07-22T18:15:00.000+09:00

Sarah in full swing

2005-07-22T18:14:00.001+09:00

Me and the bird went golfing in Batam, Indonesia

2005-07-22T18:14:00.000+09:00

Over the past few weeks, we have seen load of huge butterflies in and around Ridgewood condo. This one (which is actual size btw) was a bit of a tart and liked posing for the camera!

2005-07-22T18:12:00.000+09:00

How gay would you like to be?

2005-07-22T18:10:00.000+09:00

Ladeez

2005-07-22T18:08:00.001+09:00

A quiet pint in Cobh, Eire with some pals

2005-07-22T18:08:00.000+09:00

Spot the family resemblance?

2005-07-22T18:07:00.001+09:00

And another thing....

2005-07-22T18:07:00.000+09:00

The Three Wise Men

While I Recall

2005-07-14T16:37:00.000+09:00

A brief summary of our fortnight in the UK (and Ireland) went something like this:

Sat 18 - Arrive in London and are met by Holly - which was nice surprise.After a coffee and a chat, Pete and Pam arrive to whisk us away to Church Lane, Chessington. Suitably fed and watered for the rest of the day

Sun 19 - Meet up with a gaggle of friends in Kingston for eats and drinks.It was great to see everyone and even more a surprise for me when it turned out that 'my lot' (ie the Thornes, Thomases and Devereuxs) had been waiting in a different part of the bar!

Mon 20 - Golf with Pete at Horsham Park ? Violet's Birthday dinner iClaygate

Tues 21 - Eats and sleep over with/at Holly and Hugh's [and (scottish)Iain]

Weds 22 - Bushey Park with Wally and Violet. Beer with Thomas in Wimbledon

Thurs 23- Flights to Cork, car to Waterford and ferry to Wexford. To see my dad, Trish, their new house and their two cats (Lady and Dylan)

Friday 24- Toured around my dad's new manor - including Hook Lighthouse(Europe's oldest - nearly 800 years)

Sat 25- Met my cousin Charlie & Robbie (and his folks Eddy & Pauline)
for the drive upto Cork. Met Thomases, Thornes and Devereux again for late lunch. Then to IBIS Hotel before Doylah's Birthday Boat Trip to Cobh for a few ales, bites to eat and general mayhem

Sun 26 - Into Cobh to see Maritime Musuem (as Cobh was last port of call for Titanic and the Lisuania was sunk a few miles away) and then some late brekky. Evening spent at Doylah's for impromptu barbie

Mon 27 - Flight back to London.

Tues 28 - Golf with Pete down in Kent with Iain. Train upto Crystal Palace to see Danny and Laura, before seeing ColdPlay at Athletic Stadium

Weds 29 - Saw Joseph in Raynes Park, before 5-a-sode footy with the boys (Thomas, Lace, Barbier, Spud, Vic & Matt), followed by some beer and a Korean meal. (Vic kindly dropped me home)

Thurs 30 - Met old FSA and MAFF colleagues (Mike, Matt, Steve, Brian,Joti, Sean and Andy) up at Pimlico. Back to the Swan in Wimbledon Village for the Quiz (gaggle of people - including the Hargreaves, Thomases, Plattens,Barbiers, Holly, Magnus, Martin and Cass). Return of the No-Hopers winners on the last question!

Fri 1 - Met Pat Walters for a beer at Kew

Sat 2 - Live 8 on the telly before flights back to Singapore

Although am sure that I played a third round of golf somewhere and does not include who Sarah saw. Plus does not even scratch the surface on the number of times Pete and Pam cooked for us, gave us lifts etc

Yesterday

2005-07-08T14:17:00.000+09:00

I was going to say something about yesterday’s shocking bombings in London but, after reading this article by Ian McEwan in today’s Guardian, I thought that it said it all:

The mood of a city has never swung so sharply. On Wednesday there was no better place on earth. After the victory in Singapore, Londoners were celebrating the prospect of an explosion of new energy and creativity; those computer-generated images of futuristic wonderlands rising out of derelict quarters and poisoned industrial wastelands were actually going to be built. The echoes of rock 'n' roll in Hyde Park and its wave of warm and fundamentally decent emotions were only just fading. In Gleneagles, the summit was about to address at least - and at last - the core of the world's concerns, and we could take some satisfaction that our government had pushed the agenda. London was flying high and we moved confidently about the city - the paranoia after 9/11 and Madrid was mostly forgotten and no one had second thoughts about taking the tube. The "war on terror", that much examined trope, was an exhausted rallying cry, with all the appearance of a moth-eaten regimental banner in a village church.

But terror's war on us opened another front on Thursday morning. It announced itself with a howl of sirens from every quarter, and the oppressive drone of police helicopters. Along the Euston Road, by the new UCH - a green building rising above us like a giant surgeon in scrubs - thousands of people stood around watching ambulances filing nose to tail through the stalled traffic into the casualty department.

Police were fanning out through Bloomsbury closing streets at both ends even as you were halfway down them. The machinery of state, a great Leviathan, certain of its authority, moved with balletic coordination. Those rehearsals for a multiple terrorist attack underground were paying off. In fact, now the disaster was upon us, it had an air of weary inevitability, and it looked familiar, as though it had happened long ago. In the drizzle and dim light, the police lines, the emergency vehicles, the silent passers by appeared as though in an old newsreel film in black and white. The news of the successful Olympic bid was more surprising than this. How could we have forgotten that this was always going to happen?

The mood on the streets was of numb acceptance, or strange calm. People obediently shuffled this way and that, directed round road blocks by a whole new citizens' army of "support" officials - like air raid wardens from the last war. A man in a suit pulled a Day-Glo jacket out of his briefcase and began directing traffic with snappy expertise. A woman, with blood covering her face and neck, who had come from Russell Square tube station, briskly refused offers of help and said she had to get to work. Groups gathered impassively in the road, among the gridlocked traffic, listening through open windows to car radios.

On a pub TV the breaking news services were having trouble finding the images to match the awfulness of the event. But this was not, or not yet, a public spectacle like New York or Madrid. The nightmare was happening far below our feet. Everyone knew that if the force that mangled the bus in Tavistock Square was contained within the walls of a tunnel, the human cost would be high, and the rescue appallingly difficult. Down the far end of a closed-off street we saw emergency workers being helped into breathing equipment. We could only guess at the hell to which they must descend, and no one seemed to want to talk about it.

In Auden's famous poem, Musee des Beaux Arts, the tragedy of Icarus falling from the sky is accompanied by life simply refusing to be disrupted. A ploughman goes about his work, a ship "sailed calmly on", dogs keep on with "their doggy business". In London yesterday, where crowds fumbling with mobile phones tried to find unimpeded ways across the city, there was much evidence of the truth of Auden's insight. While rescue workers searched for survivors and the dead in the smoke-filled blackness below, at pavement level men were loading lorries, a woman sold umbrellas in her usual patch, the lunchtime sandwich makers were hard at work.

It is unlikely that London will claim to have been transformed in an instant, to have lost its innocence in the course of a morning. It is hard to knock a huge city like this off its course. It has survived many attacks in the past. But once we have counted up our dead, and the numbness turns to anger and grief, we will see that our lives here will be difficult. We have been savagely woken from a pleasant dream. The city will not recover Wednesday's confidence and joy in a very long time. Who will want to travel on the tube, once it has been cleared? How will we sit at our ease in a restaurant, cinema or theatre? And we will face again that deal we must constantly make and remake with the state - how much power must we grant Leviathan, how much freedom will we be asked to trade for our security?

Nice to See You, To See You ...Nice

2005-07-05T01:02:00.000+09:00

Will shortly get around to writing up about the past fortnight in sunny London (and Surrey) as well as sunny-ish Ireland.

But just wanted to say big thanks to Pete and Pam - who acted as our chauffeurs, hoteliers, chefs, wine and beer sommeliers, golf couch, newspaper delivery boys & girls, lotto ticket buyers, official time-keepers....

And to everyone else that we saw on our travels - in various pubs, bars, eateries, golf courses and fooy pitches: nice to see you, to see you nice

Pix and write up to follow anon. Honest.

The Best Things Come To Those Who Wait

2005-06-17T13:23:00.000+09:00

U2 Tickets? Coldplay Tickets?

2005-06-08T00:45:00.000+09:00

Just on the off chance that anyone actually reads this blog, I'd be keen to know if anyone has any spare tickets for

U2 on Sat 178June at Twickenham; and
Coldplay on Monday 27 June at Crystal Palace
???? Pretty Please Etc Etc ????

As we arrive back in the UK on both dates - one flight from Singapore and t'other from Cork - and it would be pretty cool to see both bands.

If you do - or know of someone other than on E-Bay - pls reply to this post by clicking on the envelope below.

Ta very much.

Mail Domination?

2005-06-06T11:50:00.000+09:00

For some reason, I thought of Sarah's folks (Pete & Pam) when I read this scary story in the Guardian.

25 May, 2005

2005-05-27T12:21:00.000+09:00

How mad was Wednesday’s UEFA Champions League Final? Fantastic result for Liverpool – and AC Milan must feel pretty awful at playing so well and still end up losing. [Though, to be fair, the disparity between the two teams was nowhere near the gulf between how Man Utd and Arsenal played in the FA Cup Final at the weekend]

Due to the timing of the European games out here (2:45 am), I usually watch them at home where I sup water and try to be as quiet as possible. However, as Weds’ game was a big one (though the correct footballer’s adjective for ‘big’ is ‘massive’), I thought it only right to venture out to the Penny Black on Boat Quay.

The bar is the home to ‘East Of Anfield FC’ (mad bunch of expat and local Liverpool fans) – and was absolutely heaving by 1:30. Great atmosphere inside and, thankfully, it took ages to get served as we (Gareth and I) both had school in the am (or in like 7 hours time).

With Liverpool shipping 3 goals by half-time, things did not look good to say the least. But there was a silver-lining: about a third of the pub left to go home and kick the cat before grabbing some kip. Which meant that there was no some breathing space for the rest of us.

When Liverpool got one back, I thought there was hope. [Though, if the truth be known, it was probably more like ‘well at least the scoreline is more respectable]. The second so soon after and the whole place went crazy. And then the roof in the bar came off when Alonso smashed home the rebound from his penalty.

Even though the rest of the game was scoreless, there was still some heart-in-mouth moments - especially Dudek’s surreal double-save from Shevchenko right at the end of Extra-Time.

I know that penalties are cruel – but when your team wins on them, who cares!

Fantastic stuff. And coincidental too as back in 1981

Prince Charles gets married
Coronation Street's Ken and Deirdre gets married
There is a new Doctor Who
Norwich City and Crystal Palace are both relegated
Liverpool won 17 league games and finish 5th
Liverpool won the European Cup

Ended up in the bar til 6am, hope by 7am, cooked Sarah and I breakfast and in the office by 9. Needless to say that I was absolutely shattered yesterday.

And with our own Beer Cellar Utd being so short of players, I could not cry out of our football match last night. Ended up playing the whole game, which we won 4-1. Though skipped going back to the Beer Cellar afterwards and went straight home to sleep. And sleep…....

Store Wars

2005-05-19T18:09:00.000+09:00

How cool/cute is this Store Wars film?

Crazy Horses!

2005-05-19T17:00:00.000+09:00

First, the Singapore Govt announced their plans for a Casino (though they used the term ‘Integrated Resort’ or IR for short). And now they tell us that they have given the go ahead for the French cabaret / revue act, ‘ The Crazy Horse Paris’, to come and perform.

[The act consists of a dozen classically trained female dancers – wearing G-strings, make-up and l’il else – strutting their stuff in a ‘celebration of l’art du nu (the art of the nude)]

Which is pretty radical for here, I can tell you.

The show opens here in December and, provided that we are still out in these parts, am hoping that Sarah can snaffle some free tix!

Nice Turn of Phrase

2005-05-17T00:03:00.001+09:00

I stumbled across this great site last week called World Wide Words. It's basically helps to list / explain new words and phrases. Words that will no doubt crop up in the OED in the coming years.

Phrases like 'Acoustic Shock' and 'Nipperkin' have their origins explained, along with 'My Giddy Aunt' and 'Oyez'. But my favourite so far is the definition and link to'BookCrossing'. This is where kind souls leave books in a public place and then place a note on the internet, stating when and where the book will be. The idea is that someone picks up the book, reads and then passes it on in the same way.

Am sure that there is a film in there somewhere.

That Was The Week That Was

2005-05-08T14:01:00.000+09:00

Last week really flew - helped no doubt in the long part by Liverpool's narrow win over Chelsea in the Champions League.

It was a shame that all the talk afterwards was about the 'goal' - which according to Sky's interactive wizardry was never a goal. Though, if the ref had not awarded the goal then he would have probably given the penalty beforehand and Petr Cech would have then had a very early bath all to himself.

Still, as Chelsea's defender, Gallas, pointed out there was still 86 minutes for Chelsea to grab an equaliser. In fact, when the ref added a further 6 minutes in the second half, Chelsea had over 90 minutes to score.

Over the two games, Liverpool shaded it by the fact that they defended better and Chelsea only forced the Reds' keeper to make one save throughout both games.

As for the debate who should get the 4th Champions League spot, I reckon that if Everton finish 4th in the League (which looks very likely after they mugged Newcastle yesterday), then they will deserve it - regardless of what Liverpool do in Istanbul (not Constantinople).

[Besides, if Everton then past their qualifying game, they are in for a bit of a shock when they realise that their style of bruising play is likely to pick them up a few suspensions along the way!]

On the downside, I did not manage to finish my entry for The Last Laugh - mainly due to me under-estimating how long it actually takes to write a few decent lines! Still it wasn't all in vain as I know realise that you have to be a tad more dedicated than I was! Will now have a go at a Story competition thru Singapore's National Art Council and as that deadline is only a few weeks away, I had better get cracking!

Speak Out - ish........

2005-05-06T11:06:00.000+09:00

Recently young Singaporeans were urged to 'speak out' by none other than Minister Mentor Lee Kuan Yew (the guy who turned Singapore around).

So rather than just sit back and accept things as they were, if they had any gripes then they should 'speak out' about them. Some poor student recently took MM Lee Kuan Yew at his word and is now in a spot of bother.

A student at the Agency for Science, Technology and Research (A*Star), felt that the school's policy of only passing those with a minimum grade in every subject, would encourage students to opt for the easier subjects.

And this was from a straight-A’s student.

However, A*Star took umbrage at the student’s opinions in his blog and have threatened to sue him!

So much for ‘speaking out’!

Word Up!

2005-04-29T11:54:00.000+09:00

Honours Even?

2005-04-29T10:24:00.000+09:00

Well, at half-time in the Champion’ League semi-final, the score may be level but things are still in Chelsea’s favour due to the referee deciding to book Alonso for absolutely nothing.

The booking means that Alonso, who can plays so well in the middle of the park, will now miss the return leg next week.

Which is harsh to say the least. Especially as he never touched anyone and still got booked. Yet Makele can take Cisse out on the half-way line as he was about to burst forward and gets no card. Neither does Lampard receive yellow for sweeping away the legs of Finan.

Still, hopefully that means that Alonso can play on Saturday to help Liverpool pick up some points in their pursuit of finishing fourth. And that he won’t have the worry of getting booked in the semi and missing the final.

That’s if Liverpool get there, of course. Which, if there’s any justice in the offering, they do deserve.

We shall see………

Deffo Worth A Butcher’s

2005-04-22T11:14:00.000+09:00

Two things worth doing this week are:

Read ‘The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night’. It’s about an autistic lad, who finds his neighbour’s dog dead and, despite the fact that he’s never been beyond the end of his road on his on, sets about to find the culprit. Funny and insightful – and pretty clever too.

Watch ‘Lemony Stickets’ A Series of Unfortunate Events’. Even though it’s supposed to be for kids, the humour is really fantastic. And, though it pains me to say, but Jim Carey (whom I loathe) is actually very good as the villain, Count Olaf. [Btw – the website for the film is pretty funky]

Big Support Needed

2005-04-14T15:17:00.000+09:00

While other newspapers cover the important matters of the day - like who'll be the new pope, the election in the UK, China's spat with Japan and Liverpool's great result against Juve - you can always rely on the Sun to single out a special
cause.

And this one is certainly no diFFerent and should generate a lot of support. Click here to see what I mean.

Next!

2005-04-14T06:15:00.000+09:00

Great result by Liverpool this am to hold Juventus to a goalless draw - which sets up a cracking semi-final against Chelsea later this month.

The game was not one for the afficianados of the beautiful game - but the result was ever so important.

Hopefully it will be fourth time lucky against the Blues this season!

Champions' League

2005-04-13T05:44:00.000+09:00

Great result for Chelsea just now against Bayern Munich (though I have lost track of how many deflected goals they have scored this season). Just hope that Liverpool can score against Juve (as I can't see them keeping a clean sheet) to make an interesting semi-final.

Seeing as Chelsea have beaten Liverpool everytime this season - albeit by a single goal - no doubt their fans will be rooting for Liverpool tomorrow. Unless, of course, they want to visit Italy for some shopping and to pay their respects to the Pope!

Jose Mourinho

2005-04-08T16:29:00.000+09:00

I was going to have a bit of a dig at Jose Mourinho - as he always seems to get people talking about him rather than his team, Chelsea FC. [Look: he's even got me doing it now!]

Take this week for instance: His side are playing their biggest game of the season in the Champions League and, in the build up to the game v Bayern Munich, instead of everyone talking about his team's chances, etc, they are talking about he is banned from the game and the fact that he won't even be at the game.

Then after Chelsea come thru' the game superbly 4-2, the talk is not about how well played Chelsea played but to do with whether Mourinho was sending messages to his side's fitness coach during the game, which he was not supposed to do. [The fact that the trainer was probably the only guy in the ground wearing a nice thick, wooly beanie, kept fidgeting with his earpiece, sorry ear and then scribbling notes to the Asst Manager, Steve Clarke, probably gave the game away a l'il bit!]

Anyway, like I say, I was going to have a dig - but then I read this quality piece in the Guardian and thought that it said it all for me!

Koh Samui

2005-04-06T14:06:00.000+09:00

Koh Samui was a nice break. Will add some pix here on Thursday. But basically it was some R+Rs, shopping (what do you expect when you have a female Hargreaves on board?) and a day-trip on a boat with some snorkelling and kayaking thrown in. Plus some nice eats too. Oh yeah, I brought some outlandish footy boots - despite me criticising all those who have succumb in the past. But, honestly, they did not have any black boots and the boots were ridiculously cheap (like SGD 50 - reduced from over SGD 100) - just need to hope the boys at Beer Cellar Utd FC don't notice when I take to the pitch this evening!

The Forum

2005-03-31T15:39:00.000+09:00

If ever you get the chance, you must read the Strait Times – Singapore’s biggest selling English paper. Not for its insightful journalism (of which I am sure there must be some – though, if it is, then it has gone deep, deep undercover) but for the ‘Forum’ – i.e. the letters page.

For people write in to complain about such trivial things that they are laughable. Like how someone jumped ahead of them in a queue, or picked up some salad leaves in the supermarket with their ‘bare’ hands. That would be funny enough but their letters usually start off a trickle of letters from others who have experienced the same ‘problem’, demanding that something should be done. Or, sometimes, you get a serious topic started and that prompts someone to utter their two cents’ worth, which really shows bad taste and is hardly relevant.

For example, someone recently died after being run over by a tube - which was pretty awful, granted. That incident prompted a host of letters ranging from crowd control to automatic safety doors, from lines for people to stand behind to cameras at stations. All sensible enough (ish), agreed.

But on the topic of cameras, someone has written in today to ask why the cameras are not used to catch people who fall foul of the law. Reasonable enough if the crimes were muggings etc but this ‘crime’ was eating an apple!

To quote from the letter: “In one incident, a Caucasian walked right past Security Control eating an apple in his hand – for all to see! Yet no one stopped him. Despite the fact that this was clearly in breach of the eating and drinking regulations on the MRT (tube)”

Unbelievable but true.

Oops

2005-03-31T10:41:00.000+09:00

Prompted by a certain Ms Holly Rowland from Shepherd’s Bush, I will endeavour to add more blogs and on a daily basis. More or less.

As for the past ten days or so, they can be summarised as follows:

* Sarah went to Shanghai for work
* Had a few late nights at work myself – though mainly playing pool (our boardroom table is in fact a pool table) and supping ale with colleagues and the bosses
* Shot 102 at Sabana Cove, Malaysia – my lowest ever round. Unless, of course, you take into account that round of crazy golf at Margate in the summer of 76
* Have put Sarah’s birthday pressie (shake / juice book) to good use with many a healthy concoction
* Carnegies - the spirit of rock and quizzes - is now no more. They closed thier doors the other Saturday! And it just so happened to be the night of Sarah's birthday bash - so, surprise, surprise, we were there to see them off and take advantage of the free bar!
* Sarah brought back some golf clubs (for me and her) from Shanghai so we road-tested some clubs down at Tanglin on Sunday – which was fun. Though can’t wait to get to a driving range to test out the Big Bertha!
* The BBC’s Last Laugh writing competition has just started - so will chance my arm at writing (or should that be finishing) a sit-com
* And Sarah and I are off to Koh Samui (Thailand) tomorrow. Originally it was to meet up with a couple of pals from the UK but it now seems that they have had a massive falling-out and have returned to the UK - separately! When we find out more (eg what happened, etc), then will be sure to spill the beans here!

2005-03-28T23:35:00.000+09:00

Sarah Says Au Revoir to Carnegies

All's Well That Ends Well

2005-03-18T09:47:00.000+08:00

In the end, my last minute dot com antics cam thru' and managed to snaffle some suitable pressies. Though did really leave everything to the final minutes as I picked up a book at lunchtime (a cool guide to some foreign places that we have our list of places to visit), then after work and before I went off to footy, I got a flash flash for her digital SLR camera, another book (though in a different bookshop to be fair - and on another subject too: super sexy smoothies + juices) and a 'Sunday' golf bag.

Then after our 9pm football match (for the aptly named Beer Cellar Utd - nee Coolies), it was a quick beer at the Beer Cellar before getting home at midnight(ish) to deliver the pressies (as Sarah was opening her other b'day gifts and cards at 12am). And, after wrapping them in the last minute dot com fashion (with pages from the IHT in the back of the taxi!), gave Sarah her pressies and they all went down well.

Yesterday, Sarah had an art class in the evening - so hopefully we will be out this evening somewhere for some nice eats. Otherwise, we have a Mexican meal (in Singapore's oldest mexican restaurant, Magarita's) with some mates planned on Saturday evening.

Lastminute.Com

2005-03-16T12:13:00.000+08:00

Sarah's birthday is only a few hours away and, yet again, I have left everything to the last minute to try and find her a pressie or two. Thought that I had cracked when I came up with the idea of an iPhoto. However, after visiting Apple's so-called 'flagship store' at Wheelock Place (Orchard Rd) last night, the service was so bad that I left empty-handed.

[Basically the place was packed, music blaring and the staff knew sweet fa about their products. Reminscent of any sports shop. Or maybe it's just me showing my age!]

Which was a result, as after mentioning the iPhoto to Sarah this morning, we both agreed that it was quite expensive for something that is really just a storage device for pix. And who really wants to lug around all their pix in something that can be mislaid so easily?

And although you can plug it into a TV set and show everyone your pix, how often would that really happen?

Anyway, suffice to say, I will be spending my lunch-time searching for something else.

Every Great Journey Starts With That First Step

2005-03-16T10:39:00.000+08:00

Due to a number of reasons that range from the good (ie work), the bad (Coolies Golf Days) and the ugly (ie could not find a Lotus Notes R5 Blog Template that did not require the use of agents), it has been six months since I last updated anything on www.damianrobinson.com!

Which is kinda slack.

In the end, I decided that the best thing was to forget about doing a blog in Lotus Notes (for now, anyways!) and simply set up one thru the wonderful bods at www.Blogger.com and have redirect people from www.damianrobinson.com to the blog.

Sounds convoluted - but, hey, it works for now!

So what should we do with our furry, ferral house-guest?
	Return Jaffy to where she was found
	Return Jaffy to her finder, Pete - the picker-upper of all things stray
	Keep her
	Find some rocks and a dustbin liner....

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